A Romanian robber landed in ‘it’ after falling into a cesspit while trying to evade police.

The man from Moara Vlasiei village was on the run from police after it was alleged he mugged a young girl.

After negotiating his way through numerous backyards, the man hid from police in an outside loo. But when the owner of the house, feeling a call of nature, discovered him, the robber’s attempted escape saw him fall through the floor and into the cesspit.

“It was a really smelly business. We had to clean the robber and give him new clothes before even talking to him,” a spokesman for the local police said.

Milosevic’s corpse vampire-proofed

Security guards have been employed by Slobodan Milosevic’s daughter Marija in a bid to stop ‘vampire hunters’ returning to desecrate his corpse, Ananova reported.

According to the website, the hunters believe Milosevic may return from the dead unless a wooden stake is driven through his heart.

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The Associated Press reported earlier in the month that Miroslav Milosevic (no relation) performed the ritual by driving a steak into the grave into what he thought was the ex-president’s heart. Upon turning himself in to police, Milosevic said he was trying to prevent evil from returning to the world.

Marija has hired the guards after it was found that the first attempt missed her deceased father’s heart. She accused police of failing to protect the grave.

British judge a flash in the pan?

Lord Justice Stephen Richards will have to wait until 11 June to begin his trial for allegedly exposing himself to a woman on two occasions on a train.

The judge, who is one of the most senior in Britain and serves at the Court of Appeal, pleaded not guilty to two charges of exposure, Reuters said. He will stand down from the bench until the end of the trial.

According to British transport police the incidents occurred on a train from Wimbledon to Waterloo in October 2006.

Richards is known for hearing the case of Jean Charles de Menezes, the Brazilian man who was shot dead by police who thought he was a suicide bomber, Reuters said.

Drug dealer rams cop car with stash

A man from Florida carrying a boot-load of marijuana was arrested after smashing into a policeman’s parked car.

According to Chris Williamson of the highway patrol in South Carolina, two police vehicles had pulled over to attend to a traffic accident when the incident happened.

A Chevrolet Malibu travelling at 70 mph (112.7 km/h) slammed into one of the cars, injuring a policeman, the Associated Press said.

As if that wasn’t enough, when the police searched the vehicle, they found two duffel bags with 43 pounds (19.5 kilograms) of pot with a street value exceeding US$150,000 ($190,951), Orangeburg County deputy Warren Pendry said.

The driver was charged with trafficking marijuana, possession of cocaine and driving under the influence.

Jailed phone user walks free

The conviction of a man for contempt of court for answering his mobile phone during a trial has been overturned in South Africa.

According to SAPA news agency, the man, Keri Gwyn Lewis, had allowed his phone to ring during a session of the Johannesburg High Court before answering it on his way out the door.

The judge was so incensed that he ordered the bailiffs to grab Lewis and throw him in the witness stand, where he was shortly convicted of contempt of court and sentenced to one month’s jail.

However, the Supreme Court of Appeal overturned the conviction, objecting to the lack of proper procedure — including access to legal representation — afforded to Lewis at the time.

“A rebuke or some other indication of disapproval should in most cases be an adequate measure to discourage cell phone transgressions in court,” the judgment read, as reported by SAPA.

Jailbirds use football match to escape

A group of five prisoners in a Romanian jail managed to use a noisy broadcast of a Champions League football match to break out of jail.

While the guards were glued to the screen, the inmates cut through their barred window with a hacksaw. The match was an encounter between Bayern Munich and Real Madrid, which had progressed to half-time before the prisoners freed themselves.

Unfortunately for the escapees their freedom was short-lived. The gang were nabbed 30 minutes after escaping in nearby Craiova. They face extended sentences, while the guards have been put under investigation.

Drunk defies death in Belarus

A man from Buda-Koshlevo, Belarus, has amazed doctors after recovering from alcohol poisoning that saw him 22 times over the legal drink-driving limit.

The 29-year-old booze hound, Yuri Kherkov, was rushed to hospital after being found unconscious outside a local pub.

When doctors examined him, they estimated he had consumed the equivalent of five bottles of vodka straight. Tests showed 1170 mg of alcohol per 100 ml of blood in his system — half of which is expected to kill the average person.“He was unconscious for two days and when he woke up had a huge headache,” a doctor said.

“But the level this man had in him was what we would expect after he had drunk five bottles of vodka, one straight after the other,” he said.